It is currently 2:40 am (when I started this) and I cannot sleep. Why? Probably because I have a million and one things racing through my head. Jason and I spent the majority of Sunday cleaning. I must say, since the wedding has gotten closer, we have been super lazy with the upkeep of our house. I also must say, I can’t understand how two people can createso much trash. I went through some parts (read: not even the entire house) and filled up our almost empty trash bin. Granted I super cleaned out our fridge but that was only two bags. I am also amazed at how much stuff expires and you wouldn’t even know it. Yuck.
I have started to flip out about our caterer. She seems vaguely crazy, and controlling. I just figured out tonight, that when she wouldn’t let me round up when I asked, she actually rounded down, and I don’t know if we are going to have enough place settings for everyone. I spent most of yesterday flipping out about how I had 18 spots of bridal party and family to seat in 16 seats, and totally missed this one. This also messed up our table decorations as we got enough for 6 tables of 10, and she has given us 7 tables of 8. I also forgot to decorate the sweetheart table for Jason and me. These are the kind of things I hate because you can’t really know until the very last minute exactly how much you need. I’m super frustrated because we have some “definite maybe” people that we still don’t know if they are coming or not, and I hate to say this, but I hope they don’t because we will be screwed if they do. I’m sorry, but don’t wait until we track you down almost 2 months after the RSVP date, and then tell me you may be coming, and that you’re still not sure. I am pretty sure bridezilla will come out on October 3rd, and she will not be pretty, and heads will fly if I see someone who is not expected to be there. Just sayin’.
I finally got my test results back from my MRI, and that was also not good. It wasn’t “bad” just not good. I have a 4mm tumor on my pituitary gland. Sure, 4mm isn’t big, but when my pituitary gland is only 9mm, it is pretty large in comparison. Jason and I have seen my regular doctor, who couldn’t (or wouldn’t, I’m not sure) tell us much; but she referred me to a neurosurgeon to discuss options—the appointment isn’t until the 14th of October, but it just adds to my list of worries. She also stated that there is a likelihood of having to be rescanned and several more tests. Not what I am looking forward to. I do not want another MRI. If you have never had one, they are horrible. I felt like I was in a lighted coffin with jackhammers on top of me. It was so close, and so noisy, I seriously felt like this device was meant to drive people to insanity. Mine took 45 minutes, and it felt like hours or pure hell. I left with one of the worst headaches that I have ever had. There are a few things that bother me about this entire situation. My insurance denied this claim. Why? They went through my records, and found out that I was on a specific drug that can elevate levels of prolactin. Fine. They did not go through my records enough to see that I hadn’t actually used this prescription in over a year. Not fine. They did not notify me (and my doctor) until a month later, at which point, I had already had the MRI done, and paid out of pocket for it. Also not fine. The original denial was just that I was on a specific drug, not which drug, so I didn’t know to stop it, for how long, anything. Neither did my doctor, or the facility that I was going to get the MRI at. I called them last week to see if I could get reimbursed, and they basically told me to screw myself. I am glad this is not life threatening, because they honestly expected me to wait a month, and wait for them to tell me the drug, then schedule with my doctor, then wait for my doctor to write a note that I wasn’t on this drug (or that I had stopped it for a week) and to resubmit the referral, then wait for them to approve or deny it again, and then wait for my actual MRI to take place. Thanks for being a quality insurance company. No thanks. Another scary thing was that the list of drugs was long. Some of it included anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, stuff for bi-polar people, stuff for people with ADHD, etc. I’m sorry, you’re an insurance company and you want people to stop taking drugs that they (sometimes) need to survive their life, and function in society as normal people for a WEEK?! Are you kidding me? Seriously, I’m not one for naming names, but Aetna is a JOKE. Now, here’s the kicker. I finally found a doctor who examines every possible angle in every situation, and I really like her. She may have found the solution to many of my health problems, including the massive weight gain over the last 4 years… and if I drop my insurance to go to Jason’s insurance (which is beyond awesome) I will lose her. If I take Jason’s insurance, most of my medical procedures are covered with a small fee; surgery would literally be like $75; if I stick with mine I have something like a $3,500 deductible before my insurance kicks in. I’m sure with all of my doctors visits, blood draws, and tests I have at least half that covered, but it is still so frustrating.
I have three days of work this week, and then a week and a half of freedom from it. I wouldn’t say freedom from work though. Freedom from the 8-5. This week is still going to be a ton of work I am sure. I am going to try and see if I can maybe get Wednesday off as well to tie up some loose ends here and there. We have people coming in starting Wednesday. I am so excited, and so nervous because there are so many things still up in the air. Eeek!
Lastly, on a note not about Jason and I:
If you like to eat, and you like to feel good about doing good in your community, I would like to offer you this:
Monday, September 28th, 2009, is St. Jude’s Day at Chili’s. One HUNDRED percent of your food and drink bill goes to St. Jude’s on this day. Please eat, not only to fill your bellies, but to help childhood cancer research at this wonderful facility. Just think about it. For two people you could be making a $30-$50 donation, and you’re getting a meal out of it! Please eat out at Chili’s today, Monday, September 28th, 2009. There is seriously, no easier way to donate, and you have nothing to lose, but your empty stomach! You can read more here: St. Jude's.
*Last year, Jason and I unknowingly went, and sadly the restaurant was empty. We ended up racking up close to a $70 bill, all of which went to St. Jude’s.
